I'll Have A Large Formaldehyde.......

.............and make it snappy!

I finally got around to seeing the Damien Hirst exhibition at the Tate Modern. I'm not a fan of Mr Hirst but it cost me nothing but time to check it out (that's the joy of corporate membership).

All of the familiar elements were there, spin paintings, spots, skulls, cigarette ends, gemstones, flies, butterflies, rotting meat, sharks and other assorted dead creatures and substantial quantities of the aforementioned formaldehyde. No jewel encrusted skull though, that moved on towards the end of June.It obviously had a better place to be.

That about covers it.

No photographs from inside the exhibition of course, it wouldn't do to deprive Mr Hirst of the post card sales in the gift shop, so I've had to make do with some shots of Hymn which stands in front of the Tate staring towards St Paul's. This twenty foot, six ton, painted bronze statue explores another of Hirst's recurring themes, the anatomical figure.

This is art as a business, nothing new in that of course, it always has been. After all, artists have to make a living, they just do it in a different way to the majority of us. The great masters usually worked to commission and/or lived very comfortably under the patronage of the rich and powerful and lesser artists (in stature but not necessarily in skill and creativity) sell directly or through galleries. Of course, some are better businessmen than others. It is claimed that Vincent van Gogh sold only one painting in his lifetime, but to be fair he did have other things on his mind.

Damien Hirst, however, has taken the art business to a whole new level. He has become more like the creative director of a major corporation than a working artist. In 2008 he took the decision to avoid the traditional route of selling his work through a gallery and presented 244 new works for auction by Sotheby's. The two day event took in excess of £111,000,000. A good couple of days for Mr Hirst then

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Just as a matter of interest, here is a selection of the gift shop goodies.

Love of God T-shirt Adult - £46.00
Love of God T-shirtChild - £30.00
Love of God Pencil - £2.05
Spin Painted Skull (plastic) - £36,800.00
Skateboard Deck - £480.00
Deckchair - £310.00
Umbrella - £39.50
Charm Bracelet - £11,000.00
Cufflinks - £250.00
Wallpaper - between £205.00 and £675.00 per roll

Enjoy.

 

The Power of Tech To Disappoint and Other Assorted Ramblings

So, the clocks went back at the weekend and we had the pleasure of reclaiming the hour we lost in the Spring. I woke early in the morning and heard the soft click that my alarm clock makes when the  alarm itself is switched off, so I actually knew what time it was but I was still looking forward to checking the time, knowing that I still had that extra hour to play with. A simple pleasure perhaps, but a pleasure nonetheless. My ancient clock radio (now all clock and no radio) was no help. It’s display was flashing random numbers due to me not resetting it after a brief power cut a couple of days ago and my alarm clock was out of reach (designed to make me take positive action to silence it on a work morning), so I reached for my mobile, clicked the button and was, sadly, presented with the real time. Not a big deal perhaps, it does after all claim to be a smart phone. It just went about its business and simply reset itself while I was asleep, thereby depriving me of that brief, annual pleasure. Even my wristwatch managed without me, it gets its power from the sun and it's accuracy from a mysterious signal beamed out by some distant machine and will, in all probability, continue to function efficiently well after I have departed this life. Just once in a while I’d like to think that the tech needed my help, rather than the other way around!

On Friday I went to see the new installation in the Turbine Hall at the Tate Modern. I had avoided reading anything about it, hoping to be mightily impressed as I walked in but it didn’t work out that way.

I like to enter the building via the western entrance to get the full experience of that amazing space. A friend (who describes the Tate as a bookshop with a gallery attached……..she’s not a fan!) considers this a waste of space, but I think of it as a rare luxury and one to be enjoyed. Having said that though, it is sometimes nice to see something in it. In this case, as so often, there is nothing to be seen, all of the action being at the eastern end, beyond the bridge.

Having read the blurb and admired the fact that the artist had used traditional methods to create this work. Cutting, splicing and hand colouring the frames of film to create something outstanding. Bouyed up with anticipation, I made my way through to see the finished result.

I really tried to appreciate what I was seeing, but I couldn’t. It was 11 minutes (I think) of my life that I will never see again and 11 minutes that I wish I had spent elsewhere. There are, I’m sure, plenty of people who will recommend that you should not miss this exhibition at any cost. Sadly, I’m not one of those people.

I freely admit that I am an art klutz, but I know enough to be able to say that all art is subjective and is reliant completely on prodding your emotions. Walking around any gallery you will see some things that you will love and others that you will hate. Things that stimulate you and things that just bore you. Things that will make you say “I could have done that” and others that will make you think ”I wish I could have done that”. In this case, my emotions remained completely unmolested!  

Luckily, it was a fine evening and the view across  the river from the Tate didn’t fail to please. The tide was high and fast flowing, and St Paul’s and the Millenium Bridge always look brilliant at night. So it wasn’t a complete right off. 

On the way to the Tate I noticed that the South Bank Tower appeared to be wearing a pink bra! I’d missed this story but a little investigation showed that this was an attempt to create the World’s largest bra and is now a Guiness World Record holder (no pun intended!) It was also a charity event in support of the Breast Cancer Campaign. For the record, it had a bust measurement of 29.6 metres and had a size of 1360 B.

Sadly, when I returned on Saturday to take pictures (after all, it’s not everyday that you see an office block wearing a bra!) the building had returned to it’s naked state. It hasn’t been a photographically productive weekend.

Finally, be aware that the Capital is being overrun by zombies. 

Zombies are obviously “in” at the moment, last year it was vampires, next year, who knows. I’m hoping that the current Zombie plague is related to Halloween, if it isn’t, we really are in trouble.

Sunflower Seeds at the Tate Modern

Has the World gone mad?

On Tuesday the latest exhibition in the Tate Modern’s Unilever Series opened to the public. The piece by the Chinese artist Ai Weiwei consist of 100 million hand made, hand painted, porcelain sunflower seeds spread over the floor of the Turbine Hall. Unusually for an artwork, visitors were able to touch, walk on, sit on or even lie on this extraordinary installation.

Sadly, it seems that there is an unanticipated dust issue and, in the name of Health and Safety, we are no longer able to interact with this artwork.

At the time of posting, this was the latest statement from the Tate’s website

Update: Friday 15 October 2010 

Although porcelain is very robust, we have been advised that the interaction of visitors with the sculpture can cause dust which could be damaging to health following repeated inhalation over a long period of time. In consequence, Tate, in consultation with the artist, has decided not to allow members of the public to walk across the sculpture.

The installation is currently viewable from the Turbine Hall bridge. Revisit this page for updates.

Please do not remove any of the seeds.

The request not to remove any of the seeds seems slightly superflous, given that if you are not near enough to breath in the dust, you are probably not near enough to grab a handful of seeds and leg it out through the doors, avoiding rugby tackling security bods on the way!

The problem, if there actually is one, would largely apply to the staff who spend their day raking the thing into shape. They have been supplied with masks to protect their health. I suspect that the average visitor would inhale less dust than they would walking along Oxford Street………..and would spend less time doing so!

It seems to me that if you are not allowed to make any kind of contact then all you are left with is a statistic. I accept that 100 million hand made items, spread out before you, is pretty impressive, but it is just a statistic.

Unfortunately, I haven’t been able see it yet, but a friend, who visited yesterday, made the point that looking at it over a barrier was like “looking at an empty parking lot”.

Updates and more information on the artist and his work can be found here
http://www.tate.org.uk/modern/exhibitions/unileverseries2010/

To return to my original question. The answer is, of course, yes!